Saturday, December 31, 2011

Is being competitive a bad thing?

Last night I posted this tweet:

So remember that blog post from yesterday reveling in how good I was this week? Kinda blew it today. #FitFluential
I got some feedback from two people on Twitter and they were both very positive and reminded me that it's just one day and you can get back to normal tomorrow (thanks @Schmiet and @LiveLoveNRun). So that's exactly what I did this morning. I got back to normal.

I slept for 10 hours last night so I was very rested. My sweet husband made me my coffee and breakfast (two whole grain waffles with peanut butter on them!) like he does most mornings. We were just going to go do 20 minutes of cardio but he said "So, are we doing a full workout today?" and I thought to myself, why not? So we get our gym clothes on and headed out. Here's the problem - I'm a bit competitive when it comes to athletic adventures. 

When David was in high school, he played football and lifted weights heavily. He managed to injure himself at some point doing something regarding weight lifting. He was all into reading Muscle & Fitness. He was very muscle-y. I mean, damn. I wish I'd known him then. Don't get me wrong, he's still got a great body, but the more I think about it, the more I realize that I really enjoy muscles! But I digress. 

He has this image in his head that he should be bigger than he is. He weighed this morning and he's up to 167 (the little shit) and he's still dissatisfied. He has weighed under 170 for probably a year now and he's frustrated by it. Oh yeah, and he's 5' 9". Like I said, he wants to be bigger, but not as big as he was in high school and college (the first time around). I'm giving you this back story so that you can understand why I'm competitive with him. 

Here is my part. I've battled back and forth about whether or not I should post my weight on here because it's scary. I mean it's super scary. It's not as scary as it was last August, but it's still scary. So last August I was 279 *gasp* and I've since lost 20 - 25 pounds *wahoo!!*. When I weighed today after our workout I was 258. My weight fluctuates on a daily basis, as does everyone's (which I have to keep telling myself). Now here's the thing - when I was in high school I played soccer. I hurt myself and had to have 3 knee surgeries. I'm an athlete. I have broad shoulders, curves, and strong legs. Oli keeps saying that if you were an athlete in high school, your body somehow remembers that and you can always be athletic. I don't know if that is what he actually says, but it's something like that. He's usually talking while I'm doing some sort of strenuous activity! 

I find that most athletes can be quite competitive. I'm using that as my excuse. In our routine today, David was able to do heavier weights than me on everything, but I completed more reps than he did. Maybe he went to failure, but I still did more reps. Sure, on the pull downs he did 70/80/90/70. But I did 50/60/70/70 and did my full 15 reps on each set. He could only do 15 on his first two sets and then failed at 13. That means that I did better, right? I mean, I completed all my sets. Then the other thing was our dumbbell curls. He did 15 pound dumbbells for four sets but we both struggled through all of the 15 rep sets. I only did 12.5 dumbbells and then on my fourth set I did 10 pound weights. 

The next thing that we did that he did better on me on was stadiums. We had to run 3 sets of 5 rounds on the steps. Well, D did his full 5 each time. I did 5, 4, 3. He carries 90 pounds less than I do. But the fact of the matter is, I want to be better than him. I mean, I work my ass off when I'm at the gym. I try really hard to eat well. He can eat whatever he wants and just work out lazily (not that he does that at all) and not gain any flab. He maintains. I miss a workout or have a day or even just a meal where I don't eat well, and I'm pushed back. Maybe it's competition with myself and David is just my target, or maybe it is just all out competition against him. If there was someone who weighed something similar to me it would be easier to have a healthier competitive nature with, but I'm really not sure. 

But maybe it's not competition at all. Maybe it's me wanting to prove myself to David. Maybe it's me saying, "Hey guess what, buddy. I can do anything you can do better. I can do anything better than you." 

Does anyone else feel competitive like I do? If so, is it your spouse, your friend, or just yourself? Is there a cure? Not that I want or need one, but if there is, it'd be nice to hear about. Or, if there isn't a cure, do you think that it's healthy? Let me know in the comments below. 

Oh yeah - and I hope that everyone has a very happy and safe New Year's Eve.

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